Stress management

In the childhood, we do not know what we are doing, though we are pleasurable (or nuisance) to others by our deeds. Later as we grow, we may not remember what enjoyed or suffered at that age. In the childhood, we are influenced / disciplined by others.

The day we start realizing what we want, we put lot of efforts voluntarily to reach the goal. This leads to stress when we are controlled by others also, like, parents, teachers, friends, bosses, etc.

We put so much effort to get good work/job, and once we get work, we become eligible to have a life partner. So much advice pours in from all directions, and one day, we marry some one.

By the time we understand each other and settles in the married life, offspring will lead to pleasure initially associated with stress on their studies and future. All along with this, we will have constant work pressure. Any headache from work place also will lead to troubled life at home as we find it difficult to put a stop or zip the thoughts of work. Though, people preach we should balance work and family life, our craving for excellence in both will not lead to any happiness anywhere.

To climb up the steps in work place, we do more work and a performer will always get more work and any drop will wipe out all hard work done all long till that time. So continuous stress will be there on us from work place activity.

Family pressure to take care of spouse and children and sometimes unnecessary fears, only compound our stress.

Experts advise to visit religious places, do exercise, take breaks from routine life, change food habits, develop hobbies like book reading, social service, etc but nothing will relieve stress permanently and bring happiness. Whatever we do, we keep on thinking about work and family in the mind.

We have to take stress part of life and live with it. If we observe others, for a given task, stress levels are not same in all persons. Again, with age and experience, our stress levels will change.

Something stressful today may not be causing same level of stress tomorrow. Many suicides can be stopped, if persons with suicidal tendency do not take hasty decisions. Just leave the so called  problem to its fate. May be solutions can be found in a day or two. Sometimes, the problem on its own disappears. Other times, it may persists, but we may get some more time to solve. At the most, we may loose something, like, money, reputation, etc. But, definitely, we will get much more later by our hard work. At this point of time, i.e. after lapse of time, when we look back, we may laugh at our own rash decisions/thoughts.

Just sit back and think about future. After all hard work, at the end of our active work life, what we want. We might have lost all our valuable time (read personal happiness), by the time we reached the fag end of our work life. The way we left our parents, in pursuit of our goals, our children also will leave us. May be spouse also, will leave us forever, or will stay with the children and we have to spend lonely life.

With all money and so called higher prestigious positions we reached, nothing will be useful when we are at say 55 or 60 years. In the young age, while spending long hours at work, we would have missed many lunches. But, when we reach certain age, even if we get time, we can't eat because of the health problems.

Finally, our hard earned money will be useful to family members and others. May be we derive satisfaction that they are happy. But, they too will be unhappy and you will not get any appreciation for your efforts, because their ambitions are much higher as their start point is more than yours.

A disciplined life, without too much ambition, will make us to live with peace of mind. Though, people advise to dream to achieve, our dreams should be in line with our limitations. Building castles in the air will not help us, unless we don't mind with the results and be happy with whatever we get.

Stress and accidents

Reason for many of the accidents appears very simple and silly at times.  Many of the accidents did not occur because of some complex reactions or failure of safety systems. But, why do people get involved in such silly accidents. I think, lack of peace of mind is the reason. When we are not at peace, we cannot concentrate on our activity. Lack of peace can be due to

• arguments with relations / servants / milkman / paper boy/ gas station employ
• children education
• well being of blood relations
• arguments with colleagues
• business loss
• greed
• simple problems like vehicle breakdown, plumbing problem at home, ...
• financial needs
• thinking about meeting, examination, bank loan, ...
• etc

We keep thinking about these problems and something happens suddenly causing some injury / emergency. I saw a video, in which it is said, SAFETY IS NO ACCIDENT, NO ACCIDENT DOES NOT MEAN IT IS SAFE.
Accident means an event that unplanned, unexpected, unintentional,...
Though, nobody intends to get in to accident, lack of hazard identification, failure to take preventive measures and not reviewing the safety processes are the reasons for accidents. However simple the hazard appears, we should not be casual. It should be attended immediately. There is no use of repenting after the accident.
Similarly, one should not be relaxed when there are no accidents. May be they are not reported. May be there are many unreported nearmisses. May be the attitude of the manager is not to see minor accidents as accidents.
It is common for top management to boast of good safety record and take credit for it. But, a trulyaccident-free workplace is a reality because of sustained efforts all employees over a period of time. It will not happen overnight or in a week or in a month or in a year.
Some people attach value to human life and workout how much money can be spent on safety programme. My life may be worth $ 1.0 million to you. But, my family does not see like that. For them, it is invaluable. Nobody can remove the tears in the eyes of family members, when somebody dies. Nobody got right to decide the value of human life.
I read in the internet that some organizations care for their employees by attending to their personal problems, employ professionals to teach yoga, meditation and allocate time within working hours so that their employees can have healthy and peaceful life.
What for we earn money, if we do not have stress-free life. Though, some people say, certain stress is required for the growth of the individual, I think this is purely business oriented. The increase in suicide rate everywhere in the world shows that so called acceptable stress is NOT acceptable to the individual. As there is no other means to earn income, persons accept the additional demands and stress themselves. Ultimately, weak hearted will take their lives.  Persons responsible for causing stress should think twice by entering into others shoes and then decide about the work.